I have not blogged in a super long time. Not unlike most of my projects that crash and burn. It’s not that I don’t like to blog I really like to share my thoughts. I have found though I’m pretty boring most days I work and come home to go to the gym, eat dinner, school work, spend time with the fam, and go to bed. I was running out of coolness 😉
I have found two things out about myself. First, I am driven my deadlines put on me by others. Bill due dates, calendar dates at work, instructors at the gym. I thrive on direction. There are also things that I want to do on my own things that I am passionate about that make me want to do them (i.e. find out what happens in the last book of the Hunger Games so I read the whole book in two days or heading to the gym on a consistent basis). Second, if I don’t find it’s important or valuable I tend to disregard it and procrastinate even if it should be important to me.
Once you are born you are set on a course school-college-career-marriage-babies. On the path as many others I had thought I set my course. School check, Career-Teaching check, College-Well I want to teach so I have to find a school with a great college of education check. Then I graduate and bam I’m on my own. No more paths that I HAVE to take. Now that I’m not a path I feel lost. No ones telling me what to do now. I need to figure this out for myself. Along the way I have taken many “wrong paths”. I actually wish for things that I “think I want” but it turns out I don’t want those things. I need to slow down think thinks through and make a choice. NOW!
A long winded story later I head back to the beginning. I have been learning so much about myself. I’m becoming aware of things I truly enjoy or find come naturally. Why did it take me so long to figure out? I’m not on the right course, but how to you get off without a crash and burn? I guess we need a little burnout once an while!